Anyway I have to write in English. So lets continue the topical flight of mine.
My little boy, and from this moment it will be his constant nickname, is so sweet, smart, sugary, beatiful, cute etc. And he is so proud of me, he likes me, he idolises me. I'm the whole world for him. But why I think of those man? I have an misgiving that when he comes, everything will change. And again it'll be hurt, and not only for me, but for my little boy also. It's heartrending that I can't do anything to save him from myself.
I feel his smell on my body and I can't understand what is going on in my head. This cruel thoughts make me similar to slut, heartless bitch. My poor little boy, he doesn't know with whom he contacted.